tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post6069083757971936685..comments2009-11-30T00:04:30.004-05:00Comments on At Your Service: The Lane LadyMeghan Eddyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05642871169312049758noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-75575867882175006392009-09-26T20:51:06.156-04:002009-09-26T20:51:06.156-04:00Hello Meghan!
You have a great sense of humor and...Hello Meghan!<br /><br />You have a great sense of humor and timing. I actually chuckled out loud several times, funny stuff! There are a lot of great moments in your piece, but the parts concerning childhood memories with the lane lady are really a step above. Excellent imagery and you skillfully created a believable larger than life character in the Lane Lady.<br /><br />Awesome job, I look forward to the next one!<br /><br />- JeremyJeremy Dunlophttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04662830082081557617noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-9501236419142481262009-09-23T20:34:19.483-04:002009-09-23T20:34:19.483-04:00Little late but I finally am able to post! I reall...Little late but I finally am able to post! I really enjoyed this story it is very humerous and I really enjoyed the beginning of the story. I really liked your use of diction in some parts but especially when you are describing her hands "upraised, enraged fists". Good job! Excellent read.Chelsea Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14913929586458774479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-77501531918951500512009-09-21T16:51:48.176-04:002009-09-21T16:51:48.176-04:00Wow, Meghan! I want to make a larger comment than ...Wow, Meghan! I want to make a larger comment than this, but for now, a small note should suffice until I have more time: Fantastic stuff! I really enjoyed the ebb and flow of it, the dialogue, as others have said, and just the general believability of it! It's really a great bit of work! I'm quite intrigued!<br /><br />*hits the follow button*<br /><br />Be well, seeyou in class!<br /><br />(PS I spelt your name incorrectly the first time, so I figured I'd do a bit of justice and delete and repost my comment Hahaha!)<br />-AlexAlex Jacksonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17935022085078746808noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-46891721764923063182009-09-21T16:49:33.370-04:002009-09-21T16:49:33.370-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Alex Jacksonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17935022085078746808noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-15947397680474230802009-09-21T02:01:56.886-04:002009-09-21T02:01:56.886-04:00I loved the dialogue parts of the story. Each char...I loved the dialogue parts of the story. Each character had their own voice, and you gave the Lane Lady a rich character. I have the worst attention span, but even your long paragraphs were fun to read. I liked how you described her at the end. It was almost cartoon like thinking of the lady shaking her fist. Very fun post.Stacey39https://www.blogger.com/profile/01147227412162445976noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-11595636199058975312009-09-20T16:06:25.068-04:002009-09-20T16:06:25.068-04:00Meghan, I loved your intro conversation. I felt li...Meghan, I loved your intro conversation. I felt like I was reading a script to a movie, I just kept wanting to read the dialog between you and the lane lady. I felt this was a very effective way to catch the reader’s attention. I also felt that that changing your style helped with the tone and flow of the blog. You made the conversation long enough to have a fluent conversation between two people but short enough that the reader did not get board and stop reading. I liked how you changed the style to later clarify the beginning conversation. The blog was fun to read and most of all I loved the humor in your title; it was what first made me want to read the blog. Great Job!Cassie Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06090938257582566586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-3376093429508569502009-09-20T11:21:52.313-04:002009-09-20T11:21:52.313-04:00When I began reading, I will admit, the dialogue a...When I began reading, I will admit, the dialogue at the beginning made me a little confused. However, when you then changed tone and style, I realized that the conversation served as a type of scene to set up the story. I really liked the rest. I don't know how to describe it, butc certain phrases that you used just sounded really great and made me want to keep reading, because the words just flowed together really well and made a perfect image in my mind. One part that stuck out was "to hurl upraised, enraged fists at the passing cars." Not only is this descriptive, but your word choice sounds good too and I am compelled to read on. <br />Lastly, I especially liked how you set up conflict, yet didn't completely resolve it. The Lane Lady smiled. Why? Is she actually nice? Is she not what you expected? But then why was she still back in her lane at the end of your shift? I liked that ambiguous ending. Thanks for posting this!Whitney Bourgouinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05108124572730391241noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6635064408120320818.post-38286553164556271882009-09-16T23:25:47.928-04:002009-09-16T23:25:47.928-04:00Great stuff and funny. I like the title At Your Se...Great stuff and funny. I like the title At Your Service. JoanJoan Barilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10296515910763045250noreply@blogger.com